Merf.

[letterblade]

Non-emotional venting below--as in offloading to text of something that's bothering me immensely but not actually making me wangst.

In terms of time, I am a high-maintenance critter. In order to have any hope of emotional satisfaction, I need goodly doses of the following:

- Alone time (of the goofing off sort, which includes internetz)
- Primary time (yunatwilight, recently ineffablewombat)
- Other people time (sans relationship/sex pressure, often geeky)
- Writing time (or other creative endeavors)

The following would also be nice:

- Out and about time (shopping, going to parks or museums, wandering, with or without peoples)
- Secondary/FWB time (all you lovely people who've been flirting with me? the total lack of this is why I haven't communicated with you :/)
- Activity time (assuming relevant money, been needing therapy and wanting to learn a martial art)
- Event time (cons, LARPs, and so forth)
- Spiritual time (I think my god misses me)

Unfortunately, I am currently working full-time, with an hour-plus each-way commute. Oh, and did I mention that I cease being functional if I lose much sleep? I've got four hours a night, tops, not counting chores (which is why I don't do them XP), driving people around, and so forth.

I have time for two of the first set, maybe three in a really good week. None of the second set, except sometimes event time, which generally eats a whole weekend.

I am this close to saying 'screw it, I cannot manage an RL social life, I cannot manage any outside relationships or FWBs, I cannot manage anything but self-maintenance, Cyn-time, and attempting to write.' But I don't think I can live like that, long-term. But I can't live without the other things either. And life is much less pleasant without the stuff in the second set.

Arrrgh. Cannot do everything in four hours a night. And when Cyn gets a job, which she has to for us to not starve, it's going to become even less because I won't be offloading all the chores to her anymore.

Comments

[mattador.livejournal.com]

*snugs*

[wired-lizard.livejournal.com]

*clings to and snuggles*

possible affordable therapy option

[mytheria.livejournal.com]

http://www.clsacc.org/pages/counseling.html

Re: possible affordable therapy option

[wired-lizard.livejournal.com]

That's really odd--I thought I posted a thank you! Mebbe LJ ate it.

But thank you, very much!