Things I Learned From Pr0n.
Aug. 26th, 2008 10:30 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
letterbladeSOOO recently I acquired some kinky gay pr0n. Visual kinky gay pr0n made by Real Gay Men (?) for money. (As opposed to textual kinky gay pr0n made by Crazed Omnisexual Women (!) for fun, which is my usual fare.) I have enjoyed this pr0n immensely, albeit with a few moments taken to grumble about some of the double standards. (There are men with body hair. One never sees women with body hair in pr0n this close to mainstream! The fuzzy boy is cute, especially when screaming, but I want fuzzy girls.)
I have also learned a few things from this pr0n. To wit:
1. Worship means covering something with oil and slapping it a lot, punctuated by groaning. I think propogation of this definition would significantly improve most organized religion.
2. Real Gay Men never take their boots off. This is, in fact, proof of sexual orientation as nature and not choice, as Real Gay Men--top, bottom, or anywhere in between--seem to be born with the black army boots already firmly in place, and live their entire lives with their lower appendages blessed with a natural protective layer, rendering them immune to bastinado.
3. Somewhere out there, in some dingy closet, in some janitor's cart between the mop and the toilet paper, is a flogger with your name on it.
I have also learned a few things from this pr0n. To wit:
1. Worship means covering something with oil and slapping it a lot, punctuated by groaning. I think propogation of this definition would significantly improve most organized religion.
2. Real Gay Men never take their boots off. This is, in fact, proof of sexual orientation as nature and not choice, as Real Gay Men--top, bottom, or anywhere in between--seem to be born with the black army boots already firmly in place, and live their entire lives with their lower appendages blessed with a natural protective layer, rendering them immune to bastinado.
3. Somewhere out there, in some dingy closet, in some janitor's cart between the mop and the toilet paper, is a flogger with your name on it.